Lots of married young women,and older women complain that their husband is emotionally unavailable. I know,it’s depressing. That cliché’ about the pre marital spark that goes off by time,routine takes over,and your life seems too boring and you may even be so depressed ,that you perceive it as a pile of shit.
This wasn’t what you had in mind when you said I do to this guy.He might have been honest when he promised you a life time of happiness, but something always goes wrong. Maybe in the upcoming lines we’ll know what it is.
Pregnancy comes with a package of hormonal imbalances and mood swings.Women can relate to that because these symptoms are pretty much like the menstruation phase. I don’t think a guy in the 21st century hasn’t heard of “mood swings” and all the hormonal crap the media talks about. But why do men seem that cold?
It gets a bit worse towards the end of pregnancy. Because you become larger, you suffer from abdominal pains and leg cramps and,you go the bathroom way too much!! And that’s the worst part, if he takes you out to dinner,you’ll excuse yourself to got the restroom like 10 times.
But that’s not even the core of the issue. Some men, are “embarressed” to walk around with their expecting wives. Don’t ask me how they even allowed themselves to feel that way. Women have sensors,they can feel and read between the lines even if there are no spoken words. So if the husband notices that his wife looks a little gloomy suddenly,he might be the cause ,or the main cause along with other fears related to pregnancy and this life changing event.
Regardless of how hard the husband tries to persuade his wife that non of the crap inside her head is true, she trusts her instincts. Even if she wants to believe him.
So ,instead of lying around,bitching about how your life is lame and how bored or depressed you are, Get Busy. It is the truth universally acknowledged,that when you keep yourself occupied,your focus will shift away from all the negative thoughts that drain your energy and waste your time. Or at least it will help you focus less on what you hate about your surroundings.
If you’re pregnant,and you are physically unable to work at the moment, your friends are all working now and got busy with their lives,you can come up with a bunch of ideas to keep yourself occupied:
a. Write a blog, if you like writing and expressing yourself that way, do it.
b.Read a nice book
C.Play vedio games
D. Arrannge for some friends to meet up every once in a while
E. Cook,that’s fun
F.Play some music ( if you know how to play the piano or the guitar )
G.Go baby shopping (Don’t do it all at once,buy a few things every day)
H.Watch friends or stand-up comedies
I.Start writing a birth plan,it’s very important to let your OB know what you really want.
J.Stare in the middle of no-where and do nothing
K. Take a bubble bath or go swimming
L.Go to the spa (have a nice massage,manicure/pedicure soak,or a Moroccan bath)
M.If you’re interested,start planning a baby shower,plan a theme,the type of food you’re gonna serve,etc.
I got bored with listing things. You can do whatever you like to keep yourself happy and entertained. Be your own wind keeper ( A book mentioned in friends sitcom). If your husband is emotionally unavailable,inattentive to your needs or fears & shares nothing with you… its heart breaking. But not the end of the world.
Make him pay for it in your own special way. Some men need to step up and face their responsibilities,the hard way.
If having a civilised discussion or a fight,or ignoring him all together doesn’t help, Prove to him that you have other things to do in life other than thinking about him.
You owe yourself some happiness and satisfaction, think about all the women who got knocked-up by their boyfriends and had to face all the pregnancy phases all alone. Just thinking that there are others who suffer from stuff a lot worse than yours,can help you see things in a more realistic manner.
That’s why marriage is hard,you can’t expect your husband to be prince charming all the time. Hey,you’re not perfect either! Patience and perseverance is needed.
This isn’t a call for women to surrender and give up on their dream of having the life they dreamed of. In fact, I think it can be a practical solution to save your sanity,if you lose your sanity and become insane,you’re marriage is doomed to faliure.
Because sure as hell there can be good qualities about your guy,he can’t be all terrible (unless he’s troubled or has communication issues).You should always remind yourself that you’re living on mother earth,not your fantasy land. So your effort can be divided into entertaining yourself whichever way possible,and trying to
And know this, No bad deed ever goes unpunished.