Three reasons why I hate today’s world

I always thought that I belonged to the slower pace of life of the 20th century. Don’t get me wrong,I  don’t mean that my mind set is stuck in the past,on the contrary. but I find that everything in our modern life is tasteless, boring and unreal. I’ve got a few things on the list,so here goes:

A.Music

(And by that I mean from the 60s all the way to the 90s)I am no lyricist, but songs of the past were REAL and RICH,they told a story,the singer bothered to actually feel the words ,great and diverse melodies and last but not least, only good and real talented singers got a chance.With today’s top-edge sound technologies,a donkey can record an album and no one will realize how horrible his voice his until they see him sing onstage. Sounds familiar?

B.Relationships
They have been ruined,thanks to technology.
Dumb plasma screens in restaurants and cafes,because talking with one another is so damn boring,staring at a screen however,is not.
WiFi hotspots,everywhere. If you can’t find anything interesting on tv,stare at a smaller,portable device! Interesting? No?
We have replaced everything that is natural,satisfying and rewarding…with dumb digital devices . Am lost for words.

C .Fashion
When I look at the beauty standards of the early and mid 20th century ,and now, I feel disappointed.

The more cleavage,the better
The more bitchy you look,the sexier
The more sick and anorexic you are,the better you look in clothes.
It’s all about promoting a false body image and a harmful lifestyle.
Good thing now that plus-size models have stepped forward .we need some balance here!

So,that’s it for now am tired of listing.
Cheers!

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Aside

How motherhood changed me

I wasn’t evil before I had my son,but I was selfish to some degree.and I only had myself to worry about and no one else! I never thought of myself as thoughtful or compassionate.however,motherhood brought some interesting things that were hidden inside me that I never knew existed!

ArtMotherhood_detail

Setting priorities

So that means family comes first,anything else comes after that.I won’t ditch my sick boy and go hang out with friends,and I do it happily!

Sacrifice..
Now I even give up my favourite sandwich for my kid-willingly! I was never a food -sharer.ever. Now I am. Clever.

Always a hostess!
I’m very much interested in cooking , suddenly I felt I wanted to share my master pieces with everyone.and it started with my mom and bro. I am kind of addicted to the praise and self-satisfaction that comes with it.Like I wanna feed everyone..

Thoughtfulnes
My aunt had some health issues lately,So I thought:”Why not make her some savory muffins and go pay a visit?” Nothing says I care like a homemade muffin.Right?

A lot of parents brag about the tedious chores and sleepless nights.But they seldom focus on these positive sides that all parents experienced at some point…

Things do change when you become a parent.but that’s one of the good sides of the story.

So tell me,how did motherhood change you?

Happy days ahead

nostalgia2

I was just talking with my mom on the phone.This “Talk” that you feel you need ,because both of you need the same things and think about the same things.

We were comparing two friends that we “had” and I came up with this conclusion: Aging can drastically change your mind-set..,here goes

I had a friend who would’ve easily been my best friend,but it didn’t happen.You see,I can welcome anyone in my life that I feel strong connections with ,on personal,mental and social levels..I can be a good friend,and I give good pieces of advice. But I will never allow someone to take me for granted. You don’t suddenly disappear from my life for a long time and then show up with no excuse,and expect us to be friends again! Sorry babe,not me.

Mom is the exact opposite,she was like,”Hey, I’m pragmatic. She needed me,and I needed someone to hang out with. It’s not easy finding a friend who you can relate to and share the same ideals!” In other words,she won’t mind it if that friend shows up again after a long time and wants to hang out like the good ol days.And then she said something like, If i was your age,I’d probably think the same way you do. But now, the perspectives are different.

This led us to talk about a decade ago,when we used to hang out with our family friends and had blast, every. time .Things have changed sadly,Some moved to another country,some have health issues that could prevent them from travelling and having fun in the sun,we’ve got little kids now who’ve joined the group..That good ol’ fun is not coming back,being able to travel and go to many places and dine in the coolest places and having the time of your life..no strings attached! No way for us (as we see it now) to have this kind of fun again.

I don’t want to be ungrateful to all the cool things God has given me,But now I have the gift of a life time;My Son.Maybe God decided to take away certain things in my life,and compensate me with something even bigger !

Happy days ahead,that’s what I tell myself

Happy-Days-Title-Logo

Aside

The social media hoax

Have you ever felt that everyone else’s life is so much better than yours- Judging from their accounts on Facebook? You’re not alone !

This hoax, is when you give false impressions about yourself to your followers and friends on social media sites…you can type away about how wonderful your partner is,how good you are at your job and bla bla bla.

When the truth is, none of this can be real…such a sad fact of life.

Why do we write statues? Why do we share our images on fb? Maybe because it’s part of our nature as humans to seek peer approval and admiration…nothing wrong about that though.

What’s annoying is sharing an excessive amount of images and your plans on fb! I have a friend who does that,and gets not less than 30 likes per image! So I thought maybe she’s encouraged by all the likes and the comments,so she’s kind of addicted to it. Consequently,my newsfeed became loaded with her stuff that I have no interest in seeing in the first place,so the “unfollow” option came in handy.

Why unfriend them when you can easily stop their crap from reaching your newsfeed?

Oh and another thing, “public display of affection” on social networks.
I have another friend who basically does nothing but prove to the entire world how happy and successful her marriage is! It’s almost as if she has no life outside her family…she tags her husband in statues that can only be sent via private messages,like “how about a large pizza and sweet dumplings for dinner?”… Seriously,give us a break! Why do I need to know all that trivia about you and the hubby…clearly,am not interested. So again,” unfollow” or “I don’t want to see that ” coz it’s annoying!

Come to think of it ,a sign of a healthy relationship is having none to very little traces of it on Facebook. And why? Because I reach my partner in real life ,we communicate efficiently,and I don’t need to prove to anyone how happy I am,and I like to control the amount of info I share coz I like to have my own personal space,you know.

So to wrap it up. Leave those damned smartphones off your hands,quit living in your little cyber cocoon,get out there and SOCIALIZE.

Back to writing

So I was stuck in a really bad mental phase for a while,a big while actually.

Negative thoughts,and self-inflicted negative energy. It’s ironic though that my Graduation project was about “Energy Healing” and how we exchange vibes and energy with people around us,and from nature. I did not realise the harm I’ve been doing to myself,I finally understood the meaning behind “What you see,is what you get” . I translated that into: What I imagine (see in my dreams) is what I get.

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So to give you a better understanding of this,I’ll tell you my story which hasn’t ended yet. In short, I imagined my life when I will move to Qatar to join my husband as hectic,completely stressful,terrible co workers,horrible boss, a life full of shit,little time for myself,and last but not least,away from my mum. That is thing I hate the most.I’m not exaggerating here,that’s really what I had in mind.

So today while my son was taking his afternoon nap,I was browsing through channels and I came across a beautiful documentary called “The meaning of life” it’s in Arabic actually ,am translating here. Many successful public figures from all walks of life,talk about their journey and milestones while giving you some inspirational ideas and thoughts,

I was overwhelmed, I thought to myself ,how can I remove myself from this hell-hole,I concluded that I should start NOW. I don’t have much to do around here except taking care of my son, in day time he’s at the nursery,So i can write,take a new course,resume playing the piano,cook…anything!

So back to my future life in Qatar (if God grants me that opportunity). I know that a working mom is a hell of a job,being a mom is a full time job anyway,that most men are ignorant enough not to understand it! So having a job,dealing with my son and the housework,fixing dinner,and all that 5 days a week ..i don’t think it would be easy.I am accustomed to a lower pace of life,and I get occasional help from my mom too. So that would be a drastic shift to make.I wasn’t sure if I can handle that. But after that boosting doze of optimism,I said to myself ,heck!! I’ll take that ride and see where it takes me,I’m not that terrified anymore.

In fact,I need to prove those who give nothing but negative vibes,that they’re wrong.

Wish me luck

Get Over Marital crap,Get busy

Lots of married young women,and older women complain that their husband is emotionally unavailable. I know,it’s depressing. That cliché’ about the pre marital spark that goes off by time,routine takes over,and your life seems too boring and you may even be so depressed ,that you perceive it as a pile of shit.

This wasn’t what you had in mind when you said I do to this guy.He might have been honest when he promised you a life time of happiness, but something always goes wrong. Maybe in the upcoming lines we’ll know what it is.

Pregnancy comes with a package of hormonal imbalances and mood swings.Women can relate to that because these symptoms are pretty much like the menstruation phase. I don’t think a guy in the 21st century hasn’t heard of “mood swings” and all the hormonal crap the media talks about. But why do men seem that cold?

It gets a bit worse towards the end of pregnancy. Because you become larger, you suffer from abdominal pains and leg cramps and,you go the bathroom way too much!! And that’s the worst part, if he takes you out to dinner,you’ll excuse yourself to got the restroom like 10 times.

But that’s not even the core of the issue. Some men, are “embarressed” to walk around with their expecting wives. Don’t ask me how they even allowed themselves to feel that way. Women have sensors,they can feel and read between the lines even if there are no spoken words. So if the husband notices that his wife looks a little gloomy suddenly,he might be the cause ,or the main cause along with other fears related to pregnancy and this life changing event.

Regardless of how hard the husband tries to persuade his wife that non of the crap inside her head is true, she trusts her instincts. Even if she wants to believe him.

So ,instead of lying around,bitching about how your life is lame and how bored or depressed you are, Get Busy. It is the truth universally acknowledged,that when you keep yourself occupied,your focus will shift away from all the negative thoughts that drain your energy and waste your time. Or at least it will help you focus  less on what you hate about your surroundings.

If you’re pregnant,and you are physically unable to work at the moment, your friends are all working now and got busy with their lives,you can come up with a bunch of ideas to keep yourself occupied:

a. Write a blog, if you like writing and expressing yourself that way, do it.

b.Read a nice book

C.Play vedio games

D. Arrannge for some friends to meet up every once in a while

E. Cook,that’s fun

F.Play some music ( if you know how to play the piano or the guitar )

G.Go baby shopping (Don’t do it all at once,buy a few things every day)

H.Watch friends or stand-up comedies

I.Start writing a birth plan,it’s very important to let your OB know what you really want.

J.Stare in the middle of no-where and do nothing

K. Take a bubble bath or go swimming

L.Go to the spa (have a nice massage,manicure/pedicure soak,or a Moroccan bath)

M.If you’re interested,start planning a baby shower,plan a theme,the type of food you’re gonna serve,etc.

I got bored with listing things. You can do whatever you like to keep yourself happy and entertained. Be your own wind keeper ( A book mentioned in friends sitcom). If your husband is emotionally unavailable,inattentive to your needs or fears & shares nothing with you… its heart breaking. But not the end of the world.

Make him pay for it in your own special way. Some men need to step up and face their responsibilities,the hard way.

If having a civilised discussion or a fight,or ignoring him all together doesn’t help, Prove to him that you have other things to do in life other than thinking about him.

You owe yourself some happiness and satisfaction, think about all the women who got knocked-up by their boyfriends and had to face all the pregnancy phases all alone. Just thinking that there are others who suffer from stuff a lot worse than yours,can help you see things in a more realistic manner.

That’s why marriage is hard,you can’t expect your husband to be prince charming all the time. Hey,you’re not perfect either! Patience and perseverance is needed.

This isn’t a call for women to surrender and give up on their dream of having the life they dreamed of. In fact, I think it can be a practical solution to save your sanity,if you lose your sanity and become insane,you’re marriage is doomed to faliure.

Because sure as hell there can be good qualities about your guy,he can’t be all terrible (unless he’s troubled or has communication issues).You should always remind yourself that you’re living on mother earth,not your fantasy land. So your effort can be divided into entertaining yourself whichever way possible,and trying to

And know this, No bad deed ever goes unpunished.

Rest In Peace MJ

Today marks the second death anniversary of Michael Jackson, The first thing that came to mind,is how his 3 children are coping now. It’s definitely better from the past two years,I believe that time is the best medication,or healer.

I was a fan of MJ ever since I was a little girl. I remember ,one of my cousins who was 7 years older than me,who used to listen to all of his songs and hang his posters on the wall,that’s how I got to know MJ in the first place.

I really liked his style and the way he moved and danced,and I was dying to imitate his moonwalk but to no avail,sadly. And I remained a fan ever since.I thought he was a “bad boy”, he had this song called Bad,and I believed he was bad…but I still liked this bad boy image,that didn’t harm my unlimited affection for him.

I went to London 2 months after his passing to attend a “Reporting and Television production”workshop at Reuters, and we were assigned to go to the streets,ask random people about what caught their interest most in today’s papers. A good portion of them stated Michael Jackson,the follow-up on his death case,what’s going to happen with the concert tickets that people had already bought and stuff like that. Many were really sad for his passing.

When I grew up a little,specifically in 1999 when he held his baby son “blanket” from the balcony, I remember all the ramble and gossip people started about him. To many,he seemed cynical in a way,or too extravagant. I’m not saying it was a wise thing for him to do,it’s not the best thing that he ever did,but the media shouldn’t have dealt so cruelly to him.

I mean,can these journalists really care that much about the little baby? it’s his dad who’s holding him,obviously he meant no harm! And no one,could have loved and cared for this little one as much as his dad. But that’s what the tabloids are for. All the gossip and ramble and mumble.

But this man,in spite of his somehow-weird behavior-he deserves to be respected. Between the years 1979 and 2003,the total amount of money that he donated to good causes was about 300 million dollars!

That’s a hell of a number..who would do that? That actually shows how humane and respectful that man was. He felt the pain of others and didn’t stand with his tail between his legs and did nothing about it! He’s proactive , and I respect that.

That got me thinking about one thing. All what’s left after death, is a memory. What matters most is what you leave behind ,because that’s how you will be remembered forever.

Fame,health,beauty,fortune all go away the minute the soul leaves the body. Actions are the only thing that accompany us in the land of eternity. And our memory is what lives among the others we leave behind.

“If you came into this world knowing that you’re loved,and left knowing the same,then everything in between can be dealt with” That was a quote he said when he was alive.

The Friendship Don’ts

As cliché as it is, it has been ongoing inside my mind for a while.Specially after I ended my friendship with someone I knew from college a couple of months ago.

To cut it short,I’ll tell you how can you ruin a friendship or let it deteriorate quickly (In my humble opinion):

A.Invade their privacy: Become too available,hunt them wherever they go,ask inappropriate questions,stop by their place uninvited.

B.Pointing out flaws: Whether it’s their choice for outfits,partner (for girls this could be like a deal-breaker,specially if she really loves and respects him),approach in parenting,hairstyle…etc the list is endless. There is a thin line between giving some kind advice,and pointing out flaws. C ‘ amon, even preaching has its rules!

C.Borrow money and never return it: Gosh I loathe that. The way someone can so easily ask for some money and just never gives it back,I don’t know it its intentional or they just forget it about it.It can be really annoying if you don’t have what it takes to ask for your money back. Am talking about a sum less that 50 LE or$$. But if it’s a lot more than that…Hell yeah,I’ll demand it,firmly. It’s just rude and irresponsible. When you ask for money you should make sure you can return it…right? I might also say that it’s the general idea of borrowing “stuff” and not returning them, such as a camera,a book,a DVD or just a purse(girls -only thing).

D.Brag about how rich you are: Who on earth can do this,and have any doubts that people might hate them afterwards?! How lame…Did I ask you how much your dad paid for his God damned car? Did I ask you how much money he has in his bank account? Did I ask you about how much you get for your allowance each month?! How can people think they can get away with this without being severely criticized? Or being thought of as snobbish and incredibly boring?! I’ll tell you one thing: The more you brag about that,the more I am dead sure that you suffered some terrible economic conditions in your childhood or had a very humble upbringing(I’m not saying that humble upbringings are bad or shameful,on the contrary,it is bad and shameful when you try to show off and prove to everyone that you’re richer than them,its pathetic and annoying). Drives people away…isn’t it?

E.The general idea of bragging and showing off: Wheather you brag about how clever you were in school,how many boys/girls wanted so badly to date you back then,how manage to know everything about everything,and everyone..aka Miss/Mr. Know it all type thing…sometimes when others take it too far,I begin to doubt if their whole story is even true!

F.Become a lazy ass: Enough said! Some folks just like to hang out more often,that requires that you can “easily” get your ass out of the house and meet them. They don’t wanna hear: Oh but my mom won’t allow me to (believe me,some 20+ human beings still do it), or ohh…that’s too far, can you come and pick me up? why can’t you take a taxi ? or even suggest that someone  meets you half way for instance?! If I come and pick you 2 or 3 or even 4 times,I won’t do it again…Hell am not your driver!!

That’s enough for now,there are tons of other stuff that you can do to repel others, intentionally or just by acting “normally” according to what’s normal to YOU. What’s normal to you is NOT normal to others! It would be just easier to stick to rules and etiquette for sustaining a friendship..isn’t it?

Why do people get so panicked when they turn 50?

I’ve seen Hugh grant on a TV show by Jonathan Ross,and he opened up about his fear of aging and stuff. He said he’s worried about turning 50,and he was thinking about going to “Dignitas” ( an Euthanasia group) in Switzerland.

What is so significant about this number? Does it mark the transition from being an adult to being old ? Franky,I don’t think it is.

I liked what some celebrities have said about it,that age is just a number.Doesn’t have to do anything with how smart,how loving and optimistic you are or can be.My mom and dad are still as youthful and joyful at heart,And I remember my late Granddad,he was old, but he was still very youthful and loving life to the maximum…I love that spirit,and I love those who believe that life starts after 60.

While there are people who just love life,there are those who just wait for their expiration date;aka death. I had a friend ,who told me when I turned 18,that I’m getting older now,my lovely teenage years and childhood years are soon to be over,I’m in the adult zone now,which of course wasn’t the case. But look at her perspective,see how gloomy that is?? What I simply told her was exactly like that: why don’t I go ahead and dig a huge hole in the ground,stay in it,and wait for the angel of death to take my soul??

There are stages in one’s life that you just have to go through, with each stage,you have a role to play.Just thinking like that makes me feel excited about experiencing something new. Anything new always gets me excited.

Maybe that’s the reason he freaked out. He once quoted himself as a ” sad old man”.I felt really sad for him. I imagined that I had the chance to cheer him up and help him in a way,maybe he can find a way out of this miserable zone by establishing a family,living alone can make it much harder…At least if he had a child, he would have a reason to live for. Maybe he thinks he was too busy focusing on his career that he forgot about aging and his future….

I think this can be a wake up call for all the guys and girls who never wish to marry in the near future..one day they might find themselves alone,with no one to care for..or have no one care about them…

Marriage is a lifetime commitment that has promises of both the good ,the bad to come.

A break from Myslef

in 1...

The Faith, sculpted in stone from Badajoz -Image via Wikipedia

Have you ever had a very rapid mood shifts in one hour?? I do.

it’s so disturbing to have so many emotions all together,contradictory emotions I might add. this is exhausting I have to tell you.

Many things around me trigger such feelings, things I see on television, or read in newspapers or even read on Facebook or even videos posted on YouTube!

it all started when I got the link on FB about a new book,this book was originally a blog entitled “I wanna get married”,the blog became so successful that book publishers offered to publish it, and it was a HUGE success. then after a  while, someone decided to make a TV series out of it,and it is a huge failure (still airing now). the point is, i still can’t understand what made this blog so damn popular in the first place??!!

I got an answer from watching a popular night-time talk show,where the  blog author was a guest there, she said something about being spontaneous and speaking from the heart..because when you speak your heart out truthfully, it will reach people and touch them too.

Fine. I agree. but there are soo many bloggers who do speak their heart out and they make you feel acquainted with them the minute you read their posts,and there are lots of talented writers who have their own unique style..again, what made them soo damn popular like that?? is it luck? is it because their blogs are a novelty?? ( i mean talking about taboos maybe?? or implying a new trend in writing other than traditional arabic?) Maybe. I ‘ve asked my self a question and I answered it,that’s interesting.

while I was watching, I got depressed,because i lost faith in myself ,i thought i can never do something clever enough like what she did,and the irony is,she didn’t even plan to become a famous blogger or anything, it’s just happened. pure luck I guess, although I claim I don’t believe in luck.

then I thought,with enough will power and determination, I can do it. I remembered a line in one of MJ’s songs called keep the faith,he said all you need is the will to want it, and a little self esteem…well said . but I felt slightly burdened by that,because it’s as if am in a fight,fighting negativity and laziness all together!

then I felt happy because at least am Writing something instead of lying around doing nothing!

and now am saying, raising the bar too much isn’t good. raising the bar a little around would be just fine, yes the competition is fierce with the thousands and millions bloggers around the world, but nothing happens in a blink of an eye..God created the world in 6 days…

so now am not winning anything, just some mood swings and a never-ending chain of altering thoughts that burden me and make me see the world from a very dark narrow depressing stupid perspective! I need to catch a break from myself!

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